Lagos—A Lagos-based lawyer, Olakunle Allison has listed companionship and intimacy as the two most important things in marriage, without which he said, a marriage cannot last.
Olakunle in a Facebook post on Wednesday explained that companionship is the central purpose of marriage and when spouses live apart from each other, they fail on that purpose, consequently leaving the marriage hanging in the balance.
“When you and your spouse live apart, you have abandoned the central purpose of marriage which is COMPANIONSHIP.
“Most people are self-deceiving these days thinking marriage is possible without companionship.
“Remove companionship and your marriage is on life support. Hanging by a thread.”
The lawyer opined that physical intimacy, comprised of communication and sex, is the second most important thing in marriage.
According to him, a marriage union with a dwindling sex life is one on the brink of collapse, adding that abstinence from sex from one partner is an indication that he or she is cheating.
He argued that the reason Nelson Mandela’s marriage to his second wife, Winnie crashed was a lack of intimacy after Mandela was jailed and spent 27 years in prison.
In his words: “The first sign of a sinking union is loss of interest in heart-to-heart communication while the second is loss of appetite to have sex with your spouse. In other words, physical Intimacy.
“The more you abstain from sex, the more likely that at least one partner is cheating. This is why I laugh at couples who live apart in two different countries or continents for years for whatever reasons. They are tempting each other to cheat.
“It is a biblical fact and a biological truism that couples who avoid sex for long will eventually be tempted and eventually cheat. Don’t try to be sanctimonious about it.
“Winnie and Nelson Mandela were married for 38 years. 38 good years. And then they divorced in 1996. What happened?
“While Mandela was in prison, Winnie had several lovers. In fact, when Mandela was released in 1990, Winnie was having a love affair with another man.
“I have heard someone once blaming Winnie for their divorce.
“Anyone who blames Winnie must be a wicked soul. Mandela was in prison for 27 years. 27 years!!
“That marriage collapsed the moment Mandela received his life sentence. As fate would have it, he spent 27 years.
“Companionship and Intimacy are sacred in marriage. Lose them and forget your marriage.”