Abuja—Bayelsa-born media entrepreneur and social commentator, Mr. Dogitimi Sam has weighed in on a trending issue that discourages married women from adopting their husbands’ names.
Sam who made this known in a post on Facebook opined that “Dou-fa (sic) people like us wittingly took it to another level by unapologetically insisting that the dad’s name should not even be seen after marriage.
“It sounded crazy to most of the females that have made it their calling to change virtually the entire social order in the name of whatever.”
He averred that “the same way you felt when you read those rather extreme positions from our timelines is how largely traditional people like us feel when you abruptly come online to teach young women how not to be like our sweet, respectful, patient, loving and responsible mothers that prioritized their families.”
The public relations expert maintained that the issue of divorce in traditional societies is at a bare minimum, unlike the liberal society that encourages young girls to not bear their husbands’ names, not to do chores at home, or to cheat if and when their husbands cheat, among others.
“Misogyny is evil and ought not to be practiced by any man (human). But it sadly appears to be the antidote to the madness in the form of radical feminism that most contemporary women are fighting so hard for us to accept as the standard. That is not to say we should embrace misogyny. Not at all!
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“Has it not occurred to most radical feminists (including irresponsible men cum husbands) that the more we discard some of these familial values the more marriages are failing which tends to affect the behavioral pattern of our children?
“A man cannot do without a woman. So also can a woman not do without the man. We need each other in the family and also in the larger society to reach our respective and collective dreams.
“That a man is the head of the house does not mean the woman is nothing. Also, that the woman is the tail of the house does not mean she is nothing. We are all something. We are distinct but valuable “units” that must work concertedly to make the family system work to enjoy marital bliss.
“While positive, healthy changes ought to be accepted, we must remember, especially the Christians amongst us, that not every extant norm or practice can or should be changed radically,” he wrote.
Sam who is the publisher of the online newspaper, mangrovepen.ng revealed that some traditions should not go into extinction.
“Do what works for you. Don’t castigate what may be working for the other. Don’t use your unfavourable experiences to make silly exaggerations and paint an entire people as evil.
“Not all men are bad, and not all women are good. We all have good and awful experiences. Not to mention the ones we may be regretting. But we don’t have to allow them to affect our today and tomorrow, negatively.”
He added that marriages will blossom continuously if couples make Jesus their standard and “not the nonsense we are trying to mainstream off and online, especially based on our sad experiences.
“Let us always say no to radical feminism and misogyny. And may God help us to succeed in our relationships/marriages as we do so.”
