Problems are bound to arise in a relationship. Partners will often misunderstand themselves and quarrel as well. Sometimes, one partner will do hurtful things just to prove a point or take revenge for previous wrongdoing of the other partner.
It’s normal for you to consider quitting the relationship when things get too unbearable. It’s best to quit than stay in a toxic relationship that could consume your life and your dreams.
The problem, however, is that if we all quit our relationships due to disagreements, virtually everybody will be single and lonely. So you must know how to settle differences with your partner. Because like they say in Nigeria: “wahala no dey finish.”
Here are five ways you can make up after having an argument or a fight with your partner:
1. COOL OFF: One way to make up after a fight is to be quiet for some time.
Some people need some cooling-off to process their thoughts and feelings, especially after a fight. Always give some space to your partner if you notice he or she needs it at that material time. After the cooling-off time, the angry partner may come back to you with a clearer head and a more open heart.
It’s better to be quiet than speak when you don’t have any nice thing to say.
2. APOLOGY may not be the only solution to a fight. But it normally ends heartaches caused by disagreement. So learn to apologize when you err.
No doubt, it’s not an easy task to own up to one’s mistakes and take full responsibility. But you must force yourself to apologize if and when the need arises.
Realize you’re not perfect; and sometimes you might say or do things that will hurt your lover. In such cases, the person may likely forgive you, but you need to first ask for forgiveness.
3. NEGOTIATION: Sometimes you might fight with your spouse because both of you want different things. Maybe it’s a decision on what movie to watch. Or you are upset over how your boyfriend spends more time with his friends than he does with you.
In all this, you and your partner will have to negotiate, by coming together to make a decision that is healthy for both of you.
Much as political leaders all over the world always reiterate that “we do not negotiate with terrorists,” we should for sure negotiate with our friends, lovers, and family members.
4. A PEACE OFFERING
Everyone loves a peace offering, and so does the partner you just fought with. A great way to win back the heart of the other person after an argument is to offer some sort of peace. Whether this is a handwritten card expressing your apologies or a bouquet, the opposing party will greatly appreciate it. Money can’t buy you happiness, but sometimes it can buy you a nice peace offering.
5. Similar to peace-offering are GIFTS. Buy your partner a gift he or she will cherish. A gift after a quarrel will melt the anger of your partner. Thus identify what your partner loves and get it for him or her. Whether it’s too expensive or cheap may not matter. Just package something nice and apologize with it. And peace shall return to your relationship.
After all is said and done, don’t compel your partner to forgive you. Let it be gradual and from the heart. Besides, love is patience.
Feel free to share in the comment section what else should be done to make up after a fight…
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